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trans. (My Soul)
poems about self-discovery, self-actualization, and introspection.
Pink
I like the lightest shades. Soft and tender and yearning.
Baby pink; arms reaching for their mother. It does not know rejection...or perhaps it is brave enough to know and reach all the same.
I am jealous of it. Of pink. For being allowed to be so soft and to carry with it no defenses but the gentle rhythms of its own heart.
I am not so brave. I do not know such peace and softness.
Twilight Blue
Green and swampy and mossy like old witches brew. Like cauldrons and dragons. Like serpentstone, from a lost age.
It feels archaic and mystic. Deep and drowning. Scaly hands coming up from dark waters to kiss the life beneath my skin.
There. I am there. Heart beating fast and soft and pink in twilight blue and I am sinking but it’s alright. It feels like home.
Like tear drops down a jungly ravine. Like sheddding skin and slithering. Like cold and wet and wide.
Twilight Blue.
**Image courtesy of Pinterest
WHERE DO WE GO FROM HERE?
How are we supposed to know where to go,
if not by that which speaks to our very soul!
By the instruments that reveal us to us
By the life we've lived since young
How else are we to know where to go?
UTTARA ASHADHA
I am the sun.
I am the sun.
I am the sun.
I am the sun.
***
WHERE MY MIND LIES
Deep royal violets
Blooming from the sensuous lotus
Arcane and potent
Under the heat of a thousand suns
Queen of Sheba, Achilles
Water cascading through gravity
One foot in this realm
One foot in the other
Glorious purpose
shadows usurped!
What lied at the center
through pasts, remember
Love multiplied
Innovation squared
Instinct divided
A woman’s mind is in her body
And my mind is inbetween
And inbetwixt
And unbetrothed
STILLBORN
Baby bird
Borne in the embers of August
Clipped wings, torn beak
Pupils daunting
How will I sing?
He asks Father
How will you speak?
Asks Father
How will I fly?
He asks Mother
Will you survive?
Asks mother
The youngest of his brood
With daunting eyes
He tried, oh he tried
But, he fell with a piercing cry
He was never meant to leave
No, never.
Then, outside the nest
A ghost whispered
"Baby bird
Baby bird
Baby bird..."
Three times it echoed
From forest floor it beckoned
We will shape you
We will hone you
Iron will run where blood once was
And you will know strength unrivaled.
With no wings, a bird must learn to run.
A bird must learn to hiss.
A bird must learn to rebuke.
Curses I will sing
says the bird
No, I do not need wings
says the bird
I was borne in the embers of August
Clipped wings, torn beak
Pupils daunting
They shaped me
They honed me
Strong back, spirit vaulting
Stillborn in eternal abandon
***
***
MEDUSA
Strands of ebony twirl untwirl
Medusa strikes fear into the hearts of man
Pythons from the sands of Africa, coil uncoil
My hair is queenly and divine
My hair is untamed and wild
My hair is who I am
The kinks and the curls come undone
Revealing dark mysteries of who I was and everything I’ve ever been
Trace the roots to the chains of my ancestors
To the fields of cotton, rowed unrow
I twist and untwist
I’m not your monkey
I sing and dance to my own songs
My hair is not for you
It is who I am and for my eyes only
The source of my magic and my strength
Passed down through the ages and annals of time
20 meets 21 and so I bloom
Armor, it shields me
Bed, it pillows me
Nights, it soothes me
Sexy, striking, stunning
All of it coded in the strands
Medusa strikes fear into the hearts of men
And so, I conquer
GANDANTA
I remember,
The cold moonlight of December
20 faded to 21
And I had the most visceral of visions
Melodies mixed and mused
It gave me the space to let loose
In the moonlight I am magic
I conjure myself,
4
7
15
20
We feel the levity
Our dance is heavenly
We have always been here
Across the annals of time
now within my own mind
Oh, I remember,
The cold cutting my cheeks
The smile on my face
The dances we shared!
Let my Lips
Let my kisses be careless
Let my words be sparks
Let my smile be nefarious
Let my lips be revolution
Gaia's Brew
You must keep distilling
Keep refining
Keep shaving away
Until you bring down to Earth
That which once belonged to the Heavens
BELLONA'S SONG
WAR
I am WAR
Born in WAR
I rise from WAR
I taste the blood and ashes
Iron and mercury
Lead and silver
Tongue spells simmer
I make WAR
I speak WAR
I am WAR
WAR
THE LONELY MARTIAN
Exiled from his home
The Lonely Martian charges forward
The Sun sets early on the horizon
The Lonely Martian charges forward
He wants for nothing, cares for himself
The Lonely Martian charges forward
Only when Venus sings does he cry
The Lonely Martian charges forward
Only to memories of the Moon, does his heart beat
The Lonely Martian charges forward
Forever alone, forever controlled
The Lonely Martian charges forward
A HOLY COMMUNION
I sit at the bluffs,
ocean spray so clear
Jungles behind me,
I whisper in my ear
"What are we waiting for?"
I ask.
"I am somewhere out there."
I say.
"Somewhere on that distant shore.
I think I am coming back.
So I await me here.
...do you see this ring on my finger?
...I got it on that distant shore
A promise that I will always come home.
I spent some time there, in the jungle
The skyscraping trees bore beautiful fruit
But, it’s so hard to see the sun amongst the roots
I need the kiss of a sunflower
To bring out a more gentle power
Do you understand?
So I wait here, Venus before me.
Cold metal on my finger sings clean,
I am coming home.
I am coming home.
The Fire I Feel
Sun beaming down on my skin.
Sparks light a fire within.
They say it is supposed to burn hot, red, & crimson.
They say it covers every crevice and sets it ablaze.
They say the pain is daggers drawing blood and
piercing
piercing
piercing to the core.
But this fire feels different.
I observe in reverence:
My soul being set free from this corporeal form; heaven and levity
Impuritied purged, my heart in reverie
I breathe the dragon's first breath
I wake from the sacred haze
This is the fire I feel.
This is the fire I feel.
GNOSIS
in celestials pools i bathe
black tar, scalding liquid
clawing at my skin
red flesh rips way so
when i open my eyes ill be born a new
ikigai, with new whites
i can see, the mirror wheel winds
drink, the soma does not blind
deep within the heart of the diamond sun
there lies celestial pools
of black tar and volcanic mud
i bathe in it, my gut heavy with life
through gnosis i am born
green synthesis
again and again and again.
I AM NO FORTUNE TELLER
do you think
there is peace we can find
amongst the storms and the shine
a peace that does not conform
but loosens
under the pressure
melts...even?
is there a way to be?
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